Goodness, in ourselves, and in others, like beauty, lies in the eyes of the beholder.

The biggest casualty in Life is trust. And all the problems in the world are because of a trust deficit.
Look at the way we have been brought up. In a real world, with crime, terror, deceit and falsehood, we bring up our children pretty much the same way as we have been. We insist that they don’t speak to strangers, don’t accept eatables from them and don’t leave school unless one of us, parents, picks them up. In our zeal to protect and ensure safety of our children, we are, unwittingly, teaching them not to trust fellow human beings. Nothing wrong with that. The problem arises when, after we, or our children, reach adulthood, we don’t ‘unlearn’ what we have learnt to do__more as a necessity than as a choice. Resultantly, we end up harboring and breeding mistrust all our lives.
A few weeks ago, a friend, a very accomplished businessman who is worth several million dollars, advised me thus: “You should not trust three kinds of people. Don’t trust the three Ms: Muslims, Mangaloreans and Marwaris (the second being a place in Northern Karnataka, and the last being a businessman community from North India).” I was shocked. Here was an educated, successful man, wealthy and civilized, and yet having such primitive, conservative misgivings? But he isn’t the only one with such views. To someone else, it could be three other Ms: Malayalis (people from Kerala), Madrasis (all North Indians call anyone South Indian, a Madrasi) or Mongolians! Or it could be the three Hs: Hindus, Hungarians and the Hungry. Or the 10 Bs and so on. This is endless. And Meaningless. My response to my friend therefore was: “Well you can definitely trust one M: ‘Manithan’!” ‘Manithan’ in Tamzih means human!
Let us get this straight and right: just because we had a few bad experiences with a few ‘unevolved’ people, it does not make the whole human race bad. The number of peace-loving people in the world is far, far more than the small number of misguided, blood-thirsty extremists. There are more mothers around than the draconian mothers-in-law (saas) that Indian brides keep fearing! There are so many, many more people that are willing to help you in Life, at work, on the street, than that are out to cheat you or exploit you. There is so much goodness that’s waiting to be embraced and experienced from fellow humans than all the misery that we see and all the miserable people that we dread. To see the goodness in people, in Life, you need to stop generalizing and extrapolating your past experiences, and simply learn to trust both people and Life!
The 15thcentury mystic weaver-poet Kabir (1440 ~ 1518) says, “The river that flows in you also flows in me.” He championed seeing the oneness in creation and argued that if you could trust yourself, you could trust others. Lalon Fakir (1774 ~ 1890), a singer belonging to the wandering mystic sect, Bauls, criticized the superficiality of religious divisions in the 1850s when he sang these lines:  “Everyone asks: “Lalon, what’s your religion in this world?” Lalon answers: “How does religion look?” I’ve never laid eyes on it. Some wear malas [Hindu rosaries] around their necks, some tasbis [Muslim rosaries], and so people say they’ve got different religions. But do you bear the sign of your religion when you come or when you go?” This, incidentally, was the moot question raised by Aamir Khan’s PK too!
As much as we seem we are divided by religion, community, color of skin, nationality, social standing, education, wealth and whatever, we are still united and one as people. Goodness, in ourselves, and in others, like beauty, lies in the eyes of the beholder. So, change the way you see people. Learn to trust them. And in the event you still are let down and your trust is shattered one more time, treat it as the handiwork of someone unevolved, view it as another exception and not the rule. Trusting, forgiving, moving on, you will have found one sure way to live happily, peacefully!

Parenting is a responsibility that must be ‘owned’ and ‘shared’ by both parents

Marriage and parenting are an immense responsibility that always go hand-in-hand. The best gift parents can give their children is a happy marriage between themselves. 
Pocket money cannot, movies cannot, the internet cannot and poor quality schooling cannot ‘corrupt’ any child’s values and behavior as much as poor quality and insufficient parenting can. Parenting is not about breathing down your child’s neck and dictating what’s right and what’s wrong. It is about having qualitative, continuous conversations on what your experiences have been. It is about letting the child discover her or his own way of living and reminding the child that you are there and will be there __ no matter what.
Often times, given the stressed lives that most parents lead, there’s no communication (or it is inadequate) between parents and child. ‘Did you eat?’, ‘Have you done your homework?’, ‘Why are you late?’, ‘Get off facebook, will you?’ are not the conversations that add up to quality communication between parent and child. ‘How are you feeling?’, ‘What about your homework is bugging?, ‘Why are you so uninterested in making your room or doing the dishes?, ‘What was your learning from the movie?’, ‘What’s do you feel about the girls or boys in your class?’, ‘Are you attracted to any of them?’ __ these are good questions that give you an opportunity as a parent to engage with your child’s development. To share. To allow her or him to seek clarifications, to venture an opinion.
Also, if you actually pause and reflect, there are no difficult or scandalous conversations ever with children. Kids see an ad for condom or a sanitary napkin on TV and obviously want to know what it is. Changing the channel immediately is only going to provoke their curiosity. And, in today’s Google era, they are going to find what it is all about__one way or the other. Whether you like it or not. You may instead want to stay with the channel and use it to ‘educate’ your child on sex, safe sex and personal hygiene__all of which are important biological aspects of evolution in any case.
Similarly, when a child performs poorly in a subject it does not mean she or he is a loser. It only means the child is not interested in that subject. And perhaps is interested in something else. So, when a teacher sends a report home saying the child is lagging in studies, the conversation with the child must involve these possible questions: ‘Doing what else would give you joy?’, ‘What about this subject is incomprehensible?’ ‘What about the teacher don’t you like?’ and such.
Money makes people responsible. Not irresponsible. We too have made wrong choices and decisions involving money and learnt from them. If you believe money can ‘corrupt’ your child, I am sorry, that’s a poor view you hold of your own creation. And let’s not try to pontificate if schools can be any better. Let’s review how can our houses can become homes.

Parenting is a twosome responsibility. In the event that you are having a bad marriage, be open about it. Don’t fight. Disagree. Share with your children the reasons for your disagreement and tell them individually how your relationship with them (the kids) does not change despite your relationship with each other changing. Parenting is a great opportunity to build the next generation of global citizens. That’s why it is a responsibility that must be ‘owned’ and ‘shared’ by both parents. Being a parent is being a good gardener or farmer. You always will reap what you sow.

Being POPO-ed is a dimension of Life that you have to live with

POPO: Pissed On and Passed Over!
This often happens to all of us in Life. And leaves us frustrated, fuming, feeling negative and vengeful. So, when this happens to you, or if it is happening to you just now, take it easy. You are not the only one. We are all POPO-ed__one way or the other. When this happens in a relationship, you feel like a used paper tissue. And the grief of having been taken for a ride, taken for granted, takes a long, long time to heal. At work, it leaves you disenchanted and grumpy. You sulk. You stop putting in your best and reason with yourself asking ‘what’s the use?’
But here’s a different take. When POPO-ed don’t do the normal. Don’t grieve. Don’t sulk. Don’t give up on the individual. Instead keep giving your 100 %. Grieving, sulking, bad-mouthing and cold-shouldering are acts of cowardice. Fight the injustice but with love, with mindfulness, by serving. In fact, whatever happens in Life, happens because it was meant to be so. If someone got promoted, that person perhaps deserved it. But in your eyes, you deserved it more. Instead of saying ‘hey, this is unfair’ respond with ‘how could I have served better so that I could have got it.’ This whole idea of deserving must be preceded by serving. Serve to deserve. And even then if you don’t get what you think was truly yours, live in the acceptance of that verdict. This is what will help you retain your sanity, stay anchored and keep moving on.
When we get caught in the cesspool of negative energy, resentment, anger and vengefulness, we are hurting ourselves. We must be selfish here. If someone pissed on you, trampled on you, let you down, they did it because they wanted to hurt you. And you will be, by being angry with them, by carrying vengeance and hatred in your heart, allowing them to succeed. If someone overlooked you and gave another what must have truly come to you__a job, a raise, a promotion, a gift, a compliment, a reward, whatever__understand that this person may either want to hurt you or must have a different point of view. By burning within, you are helping this person get what she wants. By reacting without understanding her point of view, you are being judgmental. So, the most selfish, the most blissful response to being POPO-ed is to be selfless and give the situation love, all your attention and magnanimity, to keep doing what you would have done if the situation did not exist. This is your way to inner peace.
Now, many times, people tell me, “But I am not Saint or a Mahatma? I am not evolved. I am just human.” Please know that Gandhi was also an unevolved, hurting human and he died only because he was human. To be evolved you don’t need to be a Saint. And being a Saint does not mean you are meek. A Saint, a true Saint, is a warrior of a different kind. Someone who has conquered the demons within. Someone who knows that it is but natural for Life and people to be unfair, that being POPO-ed is but a dimension of Life, a phase that we have to live with. Not with suffering. But with peace.
This doesn’t mean that the peaceful should not fight the injustice. But fight it differently. First don’t hurt. Next, return love for hatred and respect for contempt. Third, if there has truly been a case of injustice, choose a form of protest which rises above the ordinary and refuse to yield to the injustice by giving the situation 100 % of everything. These are not contradictory approaches. They are complementary. When you are peaceful, you will be able to fight meaningfully and successfully. So when POPO-ed, be mindful and loving, don’t be sulking!

Make your Life, your living, unputdownable!

Pour yourself into your work. And you will unite with it.
This may seem so abstract. But it is so fundamental, so true and so possible. Remember your teens? You were reading Fredrick Forsyth, Sidney Sheldon or a Mills & Boons romance. Your mom shouted out to you, summoning you for running an errand. You could hear her, but you weren’t listening. Because you were one with the plot of the novel that you were reading. You found the book unputdownable. That’s really what we need to make of our lives to make them interesting and happening. We need to make living, our Life, unputdownable! And that can be achieved when you are immersed in your Life, in livingit, fully, wholesomely, blissfully!
Dawoo Khan
Picture Courtesy: The New Indian Express/Internet
I remember attending a home concert at a friend’s place some time back, where a group of folk music artistes from the Manganiar community of Rajasthan performed. The Manganiars consider themselves descendants of the warrior community of Rajputs and are renowned as highly skilled folk musicians of the Thar desert in Rajasthan, bordering Pakistan. Their songs are passed from generation to generation as a form of oral history of the desert. Though Manganiars are Muslims, many Manganiar songs are in praise of Hindu deities and they even sing songs in praise of Alexander The Great! Their music is characterized by their full-throated, high-pitch singing and is supported by three key instruments: the khamaycha, a 17-string bowed instrument made of mango wood; the khartaal, a kind of castenet made of teak, beating two pieces of which using the hand produces a rare rhythm; and the dholak, which is a drum similar to a bongo but played sideways. One of the most acclaimed khartaal artistes is Dawoo Khan, who performed at the concert that I attended. He not only used the two pieces of teak in either hand to create magic, he was drenched to his soul in the songs that he rendered. There was something mystical to his rendition that made the listener unite with the singer and suddenly there was no musician, no audience, just plain, soulful, music. Just music. Just magic!
After the concert, I asked him how he managed to sing so effortlessly, so soulfully. He replied, “I don’t sing Sir. I just live. Just as I breathe, I also sing. It is living, not singing. There is not a moment that I am not singing, just as there is not a moment when I am not breathing! I may not be at a stage performance or concert all the time, but I am still singing, within me.” Dawoo Khan, to me, epitomizes, personifies, what Osho, the Master, describes so beautifully, “When you lose yourself in whatever you do, something breaks down within, all barriers cease to exist, a great orgasm takes over your entire being, you are in tune with existence__and you become one, you unify with creation.” This is the quality we need to bring to our thinking, living and working. And that can happen when you pour yourself into your work. That’s really when your Life__your living__will become unputdownable! And so will you!!!

Eat the strawberry or stop complaining – either way choose to be happy!

Focus on what is happening than on what was happening or what will happen.
Distractions in our Life come from two sources. The past. And the future. There’s no worry about the present moment. Because you are in it already! There’s no choice with the present. This is where we can be happy.
But while we want to be happy, we don’t recognize the opportunity to be happy when it comes in front of us. The truth is we don’t know how to be happy. We like to indulge in self-pity and in worrying. So, we conveniently exercise the debilitating choice of slipping into the past or moving into an imaginary future state. Neither of which is in our control. The past is over, it HAS HAPPENED. It is dead. The future is still TO HAPPEN, it is the unknown. Anything can happen and not necessarily what you imagine. So, stay in the present. Stay here knowing fully well that you CANNOTstop the worries from coming to you. What you can do is STOP WORRYING!
Worries are like waves. Their job is to keep coming to the shore. Come, crash, ebb, recede, resurge, come, crash, ebb….this is a non-stop cycle. So will your worries keep coming to you, non-stop. Their job is to keep coming at you. You will have to learn to be unmoved. Don’t try to be untouched though. Because the nature of a worry is like the wave, it will drench you if you are standing at the shore. But don’t be influenced by it. Remain unmoved. And that you can achieve by focusing on what is happening. Worrying from a guilt or a burden from the past or fearing the unknown future is going to take away the beauty of the moment you are in. 
There’s this Zen story called ‘Cliffhanger’ that should help us understand the power of being in the NOW. One day while walking through the wilderness a man came across a vicious tiger in his path. He ran for his Life but soon came to the edge of a high cliff. Desperate to save himself, he climbed down a vine and dangled over the precipice. As he hung there, two mice appeared from a hole in the cliff and began gnawing at the vine. Suddenly, he noticed, on the vine, a plump wild strawberry. He plucked it and popped it in his mouth. It was incredibly delicious, he thought, and enjoyed himself! Imagine, the man had the following options: 1. Continue to hate the Tiger, his past, at the moment, that had, in a way, led him to his present. 2. Fear the mice for what they were about to do to the vine and worry about the future__for his Life. 3. Eat the strawberry and celebrate the moment’s delicious opportunity. He chose the third. This is the secret of intelligent living. To make the right choice.
Remember: Life’s offering us delicious strawberries even as the tigers from our past are chasing us and the mice are chewing away and possibly ruining what we imagine to be our future. Know that the tigers can’t come down to the present__they are only there to haunt us. And that the mice can’t do anything to stop you from enjoying the strawberry, if you decide to eat them! The simple non-negotiable reality is that if you want to be happy, you must eat the strawberry, you must ACCEPT WHAT IS. And if you don’t like strawberries, then, please stop complaining about the lack of happiness in your Life!

Sometimes, it is best to lay a relationship to rest a.k.a Relationship In Peace – RIP!

Life is so incredibly demanding. Sometimes, you may have to have the most uncomfortable conversations even though you may never want to have them. But have those conversations and liberate yourself, despite the pain that they may entail, because without them, you will agonize, grieve and suffer.
Let’s take an example. You just don’t have the chemistry going with someone in your Life. You have tried. She or he has tried. But it has never worked out. Over the years, you find that your equilibrium is lost in this person’s presence. And you take ages to recover every time from that ‘encounter’, that ‘conflict’ or even that ‘chance meeting’. So, you are now in a hermit mode, having ‘retired’ after being ‘tired of trying’. Not out of ego, not out of hatred, but out of wanting to just anchor in peace. Peace for you and peace for this other person. And then you get a call from ‘a someone’ connected to both of you, inviting you to consider a truce; appealing to your sense of maturity, to your conscience to let go of ‘past issues’, of ‘baggage’, to forgive and to ‘resume’ ties. This is the time that you must take charge of your Life. Ideally, you may want to duck this peacemaker’s call or conversation. You may want to hide from this opportunity. But don’t. Stand there. Be in the face of it and evaluate the opportunity objectively. Examine if you believe that the chemistry with the person in question can ever be restored and made to work. Examine if you and the other person, both and not just one, really will benefit from this ‘reunion’. Examine if you will be happy meeting this person. If the answer is yes, and only if it’s a yes for all three statements above, proceed. Else, stay away. Peace, inner peace, for both of you, is more important than a sense of reason and victory for the peacemaker. Not that the peacemaker means any harm. Or is doing something for ‘showing off’ (not that there don’t exist such pretentious peacemakers on this planet!). But just that, it is important for each of us to know what chemistry works, with whom, when and where. And more important is to employ this knowledge intelligently and profitably for all concerned.
Chances are the peacemaker, and observers, will opinionate and even chide you for being ‘bull-headed’, ‘heartless’ and ‘unreasonable’. But you explain your point of view while remaining unmoved. Just double check if you are not operating from a position of ego and hatred by asking yourself the following questions. If there was an avenue for rapprochement, would you have waited for a peacemaker to broker a deal or would you have reached out? Do you wish this other person well or are you still seething with rage? Have you been at peace in all this time that you have stayed away from the relationship? When you ask and answer these questions, truly, honestly, you will be able to confirm if your ego is coming in the way or if peace is the way. If it is the latter, have the difficult conversation with the peacemaker, any observer or even the person in question. This conversation must be gone through to free you of any pangs of guilt, of any emotional burden. Don’t avoid it. “Remember”, as American novelist, Nicholas Sparks, writes in “Message in a Bottle”: “Nothing worthwhile is going to be easy.”

So, a simple rule of thumb to feel unburdened and free in difficult relationships is to 1. WANT the peace 2. HAVE uncomfortable conversations although you may want to hide from them. 3. DON’T operate from ego or hatred. 4. DO what’s right and best for both people involved__you and the other person. 5. DON’T try to be a martyr or a hero__just be who you are. And, fundamentally, recognize that it is sometimes perfectly fine__and the best thing__for some relationships to be laid to rest, a.k.a, Relationship In Peace__R.I.P!  

Being ready is not enough – are you willing?

Change, personal transformation, is possible, when you are not just ready, but willing!
Talk to all those people that have a habit, a ruinous temptation which they can’t get over. Smoking, alcohol, being a compulsive skirt-chaser, staying cynical at all times__all these are habits. Yesterday a friend posted a status on his facebook Page saying there’s this man who comes jogging to the same park as him every morning. Except that this person is always on the phone, reviewing the previous day’s sales with his junior colleague. Shouting, ranting, kicking butt and both experiencing and expressing a lot of stress in the bargain! My friend concluded in his post that it doesn’t look like the man is enjoying being the way he is. And perhaps he is consumed by his occupational challenges. Possibly. In fact, no chain smoker or alcoholic enjoys being one. Every cynic wants to stop and see the magic and beauty in everyday Life. They are ready to change. But they are not willing. Being willing means this: you must accept that you will go through some pain as you begin the journey to transform yourself. You must know, believe and motivate yourself that this pain, this change is for the good. Willingness is a soul-related emotion. Readiness is mind-related. The voice of reason readies us. But it is our inner voice that makes us willing.

As Richard Bach, the famous American writer, wrote: “What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls a butterfly!” It is only because the caterpillar is willing, and not just ready, despite excruciating, life-threatening pain, that it becomes the butterfly! So, why crawl, as Rumi, the 13th century poet asked us: “Why crawl when you have been created to fly!” On a cosmic plane, our lifetimes are just about the lifespan of a butterfly’s! We have been created to enjoy the beautiful open spaces, and to drink in the pure nectar of Life. Then why do we crawl? Why are we suffering? The only reason is we are unwilling, even if ready, for change, for personal transformation. Be sure to encounter pain on this path!  But then, what’s Life, without some pain, without change!? You can avoid or escape neither. So, go change folks __ for your own good! 

To find inner peace in a time of suffering is a choice – exercise it!

Your problems are breeding grounds for either your suffering or your joy. 
You, and only you, can decide what you want out of your problems. The immediate response to a problem situation is denial. But despite your denying, the problem doesn’t go away. So you start getting angry, frustrated, depressed and, when the problem refuses to let go, you eventually begin to suffer. Does your problem go away, recede, with your suffering? Of course not! On the other hand, your suffering only breeds new problems_physical ailments, depression, poor decision-making and a perpetual state of ‘grumpiness’! As my good friend from high school, Jaidev, profoundly says often, “The maladies of the body are but reflections of the travails of the soul”!
So, let’s get this right. Problems will be there. Whether you like it or not. If you are born and are living__as we all are__your Life WILL have problems. The tenure and intensity of problems may vary, but there cannot be a time in your lifetime that you don’t have any problems! If this be true what is so intelligent about grieving over your problems? Isn’t it a far more mature and intelligent response to think of your problems as an opportunity to challenge yourself__to find joy where others find suffering?
Take time to understand your situation, your predicament, from all dimensions. Understand further that you cannot solve anything in a nano-second and that sometimes you have to live with your problem(s). This acceptance will not take your problem away, but will help you deal with it better. When you operate from the core of your inner joy, you feel the pain, but you don’t suffer. If you have a physical condition you may be writhing in pain, but your sense of joy will not allow the pain to cripple your soul. If you are in an emotional trauma – someone dies, someone betrays you – your joy will not allow the loss, the grief to affect your mindfulness. Not to say that your thoughts won’t go back to the one who is no more or pine for an understanding where a misunderstanding prevails, but you will be able to rein in your thoughts and look at what is than what should or would have been!

Of all the moments that make up your lifetime, it is this choice to find joy, and inner peace, in times of suffering, that makes the difference between “living” those moments and “enduring” a lifetime!

Finding the real you!

To be free from stress, pressure, worry, pain and sorrow, you need to go within and find the real you!
There are three layers of each of us. Imagine yourself to be a Russian Matryoskha nesting doll which is a set of wooden dolls of decreasing size placed one inside the other. The first, outermost, you which is attached to all the material things in Life__that which is also trying to possess, protect and control all these things. The second, immediately inner,  you which recognizes and is aware of a larger cosmic design__but still leans towards possession, protection and control of all the things acquired in a lifetime. The third, the core, you which does not see itself as separate from creation and in which your Godseed really is. All the pressure, the stress we take on ourselves is because we are playing on our Life’s surface layer! Think about your worries, for example. You worry about your house, your car, your job, your business, your bank balance, your insurance claim, your Visa__and such. And any threat to any of them causes you to be under pressure, be worried, be stressed. As you advance in Life, with age and experience, you realize that there’s more to Life than material things and see a larger cosmic design, you appreciate it, and so your focus__and perhaps concerns__begin to include more meaningful things like your health, your family time, your passions, your causes or your beliefs. You feel you need to ‘invest’ in the quality of your Life than focusing only on the ‘quantity’ of whatever you have in Life. This phase is what is erroneously, and historically, called the “mid-Life crisis”. Please know that this is NO crisis. This is the biggest opportunity. Because someone, actually Elliott Jaques, a Canadian psychologist, called it so in 1965, we have believed it to be one! Hence while we see that our lives are perhaps pre-designed, we are worried about our time on this planet ticking away and so rush to go on to further control, further possess and further protect our lifetime’s acquisitions. Instead of reaching outward one more time, which we already know is the source of much pressure and stress, try going one layer below. The third you, your core doll in your personalized Matryoshka nesting doll set, is where you will find complete peace. Arriving here is when you will find no pressure, no want, no worry, no sorrow, and complete, unadulterated bliss. This is the layer that insulates you from all the chaos and turbulence in your Life. This is when you can feel__and therefore say__that you are capable of living in this world and yet being above it! Or when you can claim to live in the world but not be of it, as the Bible says.
This really means that when you are the outermost doll, which we all are, when we are emerging into early adulthood with starry eyes, dreams, wants, aspirations, lusts and desires, you are individualistic. Your worries are about you. Your wants are about you and your loved ones. But when you go deeper, to the next doll, you do see that things have been happening much beyond your own control and imagination. You see the design. You may deny it. But you can’t claim to have been untouched by it. It is only when you encounter the third doll, the real you, that you see how you are Creation, the Universe and the God, that you have always been seeking!

The best way to win an argument is to not speak at all

In the face of all provocation, silence is the best weapon.
Silence is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of an astute evolution, absolute mastery and a scientific temperament. But most of us think just the opposite is true. We want to react to every provocation, respond to each impulse and make more noises__that are seen and heard__than take concrete action  on situations that matter greatly to us. Speech, rhetoric and a visible expression of intent seem to be more palatable, more in demand, than a silent resolve and resolute action.
Yet it is those who make no noises that work the hardest and deliver the most. Look around you. In your family, at work, in society. All that is being accomplished is by those that put their heads down than those that shoot off their mouths. Amongst other species too, the ants are the ones that get the most done, making no noise whatsoever. Over the years, I too have transformed from being ‘visible, expressive and overtly charged’ in any situation to now being a ‘silent yet focused soldier’. I rue a conversation__no, it was a monologue, with me alone speaking!__that I once had with my dad years ago, as much as I remain inspired by it. I was angry with my dad for being a ‘silent spectator’ to the goings-on in the family and called him over to ‘speak my mind’. I spoke animatedly, taunting him, accusing him of inaction and ineptitude. I even recall my own words vividly: “Dad, you are making us all victims because of your godforsaken silence”. My dad, predictably, remained silent and refused to respond to my charges or provocations! Today, somewhere in the third quarter of my Life, I hold that meeting with my dad as a beacon, a shining light, of living intelligently. Over the same years, since that monologue, I have seen my dad handle many a Life storm, and he is still handling one at the moment, with silence as his Brahmastra (the sacred mythological all-powerful weapon that can wipe out all evil). I have learnt from his silence.
Silence, therefore, is not a sign of giving in or giving up. It is action in its purest, all-pervasive form. Silence is our native state. The entire Universe is cloaked in silence. And this is from where all energy manifests. So, by choosing to be silent in any situation__in public debates, in mud-slinging campaigns, in the face of allegations and accusations, amidst rabid, verbose, flaky points of view__you are demonstrating enormous will and are conserving precious energy to deploy into action than dissipate it in unnecessary word-fare. Here’s what Greek philosopher Xenocrates (396~314 BC) confessed to: “I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.” When you are silent, you connect with your deeper Self, your real Self. That’s where all the energy that created you lies. When you tap into that energy and harness it, all the actions you pursue will yield results and ensure the outcomes you want. The best way to win any battle is not to fight at all. The best way to win an argument is to not speak at all__but to always and only act on what you believe in.