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the happynesswala – "Inspiring 'Happyness'", Sharing Life Lessons from Lived Experiences! Inspired Speaker, Life Coach and Author of "Fall Like A Rose Petal"!

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Tag: Silence

The value of being silent

AVIS-on-Happyness
Author AVIS ViswanathanPosted on September 2, 2021Format ImageCategories Art of Living, AVIS on Happyness, AVIS on Leadership, Happiness, Intelligent Living, Silence, the happynesswalaTags Art of Living, AVIS on Happyness, AVIS Viswanathan, Being Silent, Don't Judge, Fall Like A Rose Petal, Happiness, Inner Peace, Intelligent Living, Life, Life Lessons, Non-judgmental, Silence, Spirituality, the happynesswala, the happynesswalas, The Power of SilenceLeave a comment on The value of being silent

Being silent is a great response

Author AVIS ViswanathanPosted on December 1, 2020Format ImageCategories AVIS on Happyness, Equanimity, Life Lessons, Silence, the happynesswalaTags Art of Living, AVIS on Happyness, Fall Like A Rose Petal, Grief, Grudge, Guilt, Happiness, Inner Peace, Intelligent Living, Life Coach, Life Coaching, Life Lessons, Relationships, Silence, the happynesswala, the happynesswalas1 Comment on Being silent is a great response

Invest in your “Me Time” and, like Nandini, fly!

“I am a bird. And I want to fly.”

When she was barely six, Nandini Nair recalls writing down this aspiration for herself in a school assignment that invited each student in her class to share what or who they wanted to be when they grew up.

Over 25 years later, Nandini recounted this memory, in a Conversation that she had with me in the second Edition of our Happyness Reboot Series on Wednesday, 4th December. Happyness Reboot is a live, reflective, non-commercial Conversation Series curated by Vaani and me that explores human stories and discusses the opportunities, issues, challenges and emotions that truly impact Happiness at the Workplace.

In this Edition of the Series, we explored “Me Time” – a basic necessity and primary responsibility that everyone consistently ignores!

The truth is that almost everyone, at some point in time, feels like they are running on a treadmill, chasing meetings, chores and deadlines endlessly. They often feel they are sleep-deprived.  And even as a sense of feeling incomplete and unfulfilled is gnawing at them, they are searching for a quiet place and time. Some people even feel they are heading for a breakdown!

These are a few reasons why we believe you must create time – your own “Me Time”, for your Happiness, to be you, to lose yourself in whatever you love doing!

Nandini is a fine example of someone who has managed to pull off this amazing feat of creating and sustaining her “Me Time” consistently over the past decade. Here’s why I say this. Nandini is a young, dynamic, Indian Revenue Service (IRS) Officer, who is currently a Deputy Commissioner of Income Tax. But despite her high-energy, high-pressure work routine, Nandini finds the time to immerse herself in art and dance. She’s no amateur; she holds shows and performances as any consummate artist would!

AVIS-Nandini-Happyness-Reboot
Nandini in conversation with AVIS. Picture by Raam Frames

How does she do it, I asked Nandini, pointing out that several people in her position may have well discontinued doing what they love doing citing work and family pressures.

Nandini’s reply showcases the understanding she has about what Life is and what she wants out of it:

  • “To me, my art, whether it is theatre or dance or painting, is not just another hobby. It offers me a ‘great escape’ from the stresses of everyday Life. While theatre helps me meet new people from diverse backgrounds and enhances my awareness of the power of community, dance – even as a daily practice – is an opportunity to be physically and spiritually expressive. And painting for me is a private, intensely personal, experience; each of my paintings is a ‘rescuer’ that has helped me during my troubled, anguished times…each work of mine has me, my feelings, deeply embedded in them.”
  • “Without my art, I would have gone mad!”
  • “I don’t have all the time that people imagine I have to do many things. I am not a very systematic person either. I simply create the time when I have to do what I have to do – whether it is my art or whether I am fulfilling my professional responsibilities.”
  • “I don’t like stereotypes. I don’t believe that long hours mean greater productivity. As long as you are completing what you are setting out to do, you are doing great.”
  • “Which is why I am not just an artist or an IRS officer…I am clear that I am a bird and I want to fly…if this means I will keep trying new experiences that enrich me and allow me to express myself…I surely will find the time, I will find the means, to do all of them.”

Nandini-Nair-Happyness-Reboot
Nandini Nair. Picture by Vinodh Velayudhan

This clarity is indeed remarkable. Nandini refuses to allow herself to be boxed in by society’s views of how people must lead their lives. Society imagines that a working woman will not necessarily be able to do multiple things beyond fulfilling her professional and family roles or that everyday living pressures will suck your Life out so much that you won’t have the energy or time to indulge in immersive experiences like art or music or whatever it is that you are deeply passionate about. But Nandini’s I-am-a-bird-and-I-want-to-fly outlook throws social stereotypes out of the window. So she always finds the time, her “Me Time”, to be who she truly is – and to, well, fly!!!

Vaani and I totally relate to Nandini’s outlook. We too have evidently busted stereotypes by being the happynesswalas even though, in a worldly sense, we are failed entrepreneurs! On Wednesday evening, I also shared why we both completely understand and champion the value of “Me Time”.

To be sure, in 2004, when I was 36, my diabetologist had served me a wake-up call – my sugar levels were horribly high, my cholesterol was showing a worrisome spike too, I had a tobacco habit, I was drinking daily and, at 95 kilos, I certainly was over-weight. Shaken up from my stupor, I embraced a meditative practice called mouna – observing silence for an hour daily – which helped me drop anchor in a time of great stress and strife. Mouna transformed me. Physically, it helped me focus on my health; I lost 22 kilos in six months back then! It was mouna too that helped me and Vaani understand the transient nature of Life and helped us learn the art of being non-worrying, non-frustrated and non-suffering. It is through learning this art that we discovered the ability to be happy despite our circumstances.

And it was mouna that brought me back to writing. You see, I am first a writer; I have spent most of the years in the first decade of my career as a journalist. But the lure of worldly success, the challenges of entrepreneurship, the tribulations of trying to save a sinking business – all these had weaned me away from writing for almost 15+ years. But as we descended into our bankruptcy in 2007, when fear and darkness engulfed us, mouna reminded me of what I was missing – writing! I found writing therapeutic and a deeply immersive daily practice. I started with writing this Blog, which I sustained daily for 10 years on the trot, without missing a single day! I still maintain much of that prolificity though I do take reflective pauses. My return to writing led me to publishing my book, Fall Like A Rose Petal, in 2014. And through doing all of this, Vaani and I awoke to our Life’s Purpose – Inspiring ‘Happyness’!

So, simply, “Me Time” has changed the game for us. It introduced mouna to us, it is our anchor, it inspires us to Happiness, it sustains my daily writing and it has truly aided and abetted our survival through this enduring, tumultuous, 12-year phase of our bankruptcy. It has helped us stand in the midst of the everyday battle of Life, in the whirl and madness of the chaos that surrounds us, and has taught us the ability to be unmoved.

Which is why, I concluded Wednesday’s Conversation by sharing a key learning from our own lived experience. I said that intelligent living simply means recognizing the perishable nature of Life and choosing not to postpone Happiness. It means focusing only on what matters most to you, on what you love doing. A simple beginning can be made by investing in your “Me Time”, in one hour on yourself daily – start with your health and with what you are deeply passionate about, what makes you come alive! When you do create that one hour for yourself, you will, magically, see how you gain control of the remaining 23 hours of the day!

AVIS-on-Happyness

Note: AVIS and Vaani are the happynesswalas. They believe their Life’s Purpose is Inspiring ‘Happyness’! They are going through a fascinating Life-changing experience – a crippling bankruptcy!! Look them up here: www.avisviswanathan.in and www.avinitiatives.co.in.

Author AVIS ViswanathanPosted on December 6, 2019December 6, 2019Categories AVIS on Happyness, Happiness, Inner Peace, Intelligent Living, Life, Spirituality, UncategorizedTags Anxiety, Art of Living, Artist, AVIS on Happyness, AVIS Viswanathan, Destress, Diabetes, Entrepreneurship, Equanimity, Fall Like A Rose Petal, Happiness, Happyness Reboot, Indian Revenue Service, Inner Peace, Inspiring Happiness, Inspiring Happyness, Intelligent Living, Leadership, Life, Life Coach, Life Coaching, Life Lessons, Life Quotes, Me Time, Meditation, Mindfulness, Mouna, Nandini Nair, Passion, Personal Leadership, Silence, Silence Periods, Small Talk, Spirituality, Stress, the happynesswala, the happynesswalas, Uncategorized, VaaniLeave a comment on Invest in your “Me Time” and, like Nandini, fly!

Train your mind to be happy

AVIS-on-Happyness

Author AVIS ViswanathanPosted on August 6, 2019Format ImageCategories Happiness, Inner Peace, Intelligent Living, Life, Mouna, Spirituality, UncategorizedTags Art of Living, AVIS on Happyness, AVIS Viswanathan, Fall Like A Rose Petal, Future, Happiness, Inner Peace, Inspiring Happiness, Inspiring Happyness, Intelligent Living, Life, Life Coach, Life Coaching, Life Lessons, Life Quotes, Living in the Moment, Living in the Now, Living in the Present, Mouna, Pain, Past, Silence, Silence Periods, Spirituality, Suffering, the happynesswala, Uncategorized, Untrained MindLeave a comment on Train your mind to be happy

Silence, no response, in itself is a powerful response

AVIS-on-Happyness

Author AVIS ViswanathanPosted on July 23, 2019July 23, 2019Format ImageCategories Happiness, Inner Peace, Intelligent Living, Life, Silence, Spirituality, UncategorizedTags Acrimony, Art of Living, AVIS on Happyness, AVIS Viswanathan, Fall Like A Rose Petal, Happiness, Happiness is a Decision, Inner Peace, Inspiring Happiness, Inspiring Happyness, Intelligent Living, Let Go, Life, Life Coach, Life Coaching, Life Lessons, Move On, Silence, Spirituality, the happynesswala, The Power of Silence, Uncategorized1 Comment on Silence, no response, in itself is a powerful response

Inspirations for a simple, happy, purposeful Life…

Here’s why I relate to Girish Karnad’s approach to living – and why I celebrate the beauty and simplicity of his final journey!

 
While I definitely believe that there is a Higher Energy that nurtures all forms of creation, I don’t believe in the popular notion of God as a form/source outside of us, that is cloaked in the (unnecessary, avoidable) garb of religion! The Higher Energy I worship is Life itself – who I regard as my Teacher, which is the source for my very ‘being’ in the first place, and which is far more intelligent and compassionate than all its creations! This Higher Energy may be inscrutable alright, but that it exists is undeniable!
 
That’s perhaps why I find Girish Karnad’s outlook inspiring – his views on Life, God, religion and rituals mirror Vaani‘s and mine. To live a simple, happy, purposeful Life, we have realized, we certainly don’t need the three crutches that we are conditioned by family/society to cling on to – the popular notion of God, religion and rituals!
 
I believe there were no priests and rituals for Karnad’s final journey – just readings from his works! So amazing, so beautiful!
 
This excerpt from an article in today’s ‘Mint’ relevantly explores Karnad’s inspiration to live – and die – without frills!
New_Doc_2019-06-14_07.41.05_1[1]
 
Also, what you find below is a prayer I wrote to Life on my mobile phone in December 2007, when we were in the throes of darkness – the realization that we were bankrupt had just hit us and we were totally clueless on where to begin and what to do!
Ever since, I meditate on this prayer daily, surrendering to Life’s flow…
AVIS-on-Happiness-A-Prayer-To-Life
PS: Girish Karnad passed away on Monday, June 10, 2019.
Author AVIS ViswanathanPosted on June 14, 2019June 14, 2019Categories Happiness, Inner Peace, Intelligent Living, Life, Spirituality, UncategorizedTags Anger, Art of Living, AVIS on Happyness, AVIS Viswanathan, Bhagavad Gita, Death, Fall Like A Rose Petal, Forgiveness, Girish Karnad, God, Gratitude, Grief, Guilt, Happiness, Humility, Inner Peace, Inspiring Happiness, Inspiring Happyness, Intelligent Living, Jealousy, Let Go, Life, Life Coach, Life Coaching, Life Lessons, Life My Teacher, Life Quotes, mint, Mouna, Prayer, Religion, Rituals, Silence, Spirituality, Surrender, the happynesswala, Total Surrender, UncategorizedLeave a comment on Inspirations for a simple, happy, purposeful Life…

Clarify on another’s opinion, but don’t resist it!

AVIS-on-Happiness

Author AVIS ViswanathanPosted on May 17, 2019Format ImageCategories Happiness, Inner Peace, Intelligent Living, Life, Spirituality, UncategorizedTags Amar Prem, Anger, Art of Living, AVIS on Happyness, AVIS Viswanathan, Don't Resist Life, Equanimity, Fall Like A Rose Petal, Inner Peace, Intelligent Living, Kishore Kumar, Kuch Toh Log Kahenge, Let Go, Letting Go, Life, Life Coach, Life Coaching, Life Lessons, Life Quotes, Move On, Non-Suffering, Opinions, Pain, Silence, Spirituality, Suffering, the happynesswala, Uncategorized, UnmovedLeave a comment on Clarify on another’s opinion, but don’t resist it!

When you win a battle even without fighting!

AVIS-on-Happiness

Author AVIS ViswanathanPosted on April 10, 2019Format ImageCategories Happiness, Inner Peace, Intelligent Living, Life, Spirituality, UncategorizedTags Anger, Art of Living, AVIS on Happyness, AVIS Viswanathan, Battle, Compassion, Equanimity, Fall Like A Rose Petal, Inner Peace, Intelligent Living, Life, Life Coach, Life Coaching, Life Lessons, Life Quotes, Silence, Spirituality, Suffering, The Best Way To Win A Battle Is To Not Fight At All, the happynesswala, the happynesswalas, Uncategorized1 Comment on When you win a battle even without fighting!

Prioritize protecting your inner peace over settling petty scores!

AVIS-on-Happyness

Author AVIS ViswanathanPosted on March 7, 2019March 7, 2019Format ImageCategories Happiness, Inner Peace, Intelligent Living, Life, Spirituality, UncategorizedTags Art of Living, AVIS Viswanathan, Battle, Equanimity, Fall Like A Rose Petal, Fight, Happiness, Inner Peace, Inspiring Happyness, Intelligent Living, Let Go, Life, Move On, Petty Fights, Silence, Spirituality, The Best Way To Win A Battle Is To Not Fight At All, the happynesswala, Uncategorized, Unmoved1 Comment on Prioritize protecting your inner peace over settling petty scores!

What the Indigo cockpit door signage teaches you about Life

Non-worrying is an intelligent choice you can make.

If you are on an Indigo flight the next time, pause as you board and glance at the cockpit door. A little blue sticker advises the crew to leave their worries out of their work: “Flying is a serious profession, do not carry your worries beyond this point.” Even as I shot a picture, our flight attendant and Leading Lady Vaishali said, “I follow this advice all the time, Sir!”

NIaoEnk

That’s an intelligent choice Vaishali makes. But the sticker’s message is not applicable only to the flying profession. The way I see it is like this: “Living is a serious business. And we must not let our worries come in the way of living our Life to the fullest!”

Worry is a human invention; it is not a part of Creation. We worry only because we are not in control of our mind. The human mind thinks 60,000 thoughts a day. Now, you can’t get rid of thoughts. They will keep arising in your mind just the way waves arise in the ocean. And the nature of the mind is such that, in its untrained state, it thrives in the dead past spewing thoughts of anger, grief and guilt or it races to the unborn future painting dark, worrisome, fearful scenarios that cause you to be steeped in anxiety, insecurity and stress. When you train your mind to anchor only in the present moment, it becomes powerless. In its powerless state, the mind learns to live fully in the present moment. In the now, the past and the future are both irrelevant. This understanding, and a disciplined practice of any form of meditation to train your mind, are what can lead you to be non-worrying.

Simply, there are only two kinds of problems in Life. One kind are those problems that you can solve. So, why worry? Another kind are those problems that you cannot solve. Again, why worry? Either way, worrying is a completely futile activity. Worrying has solved no problem – ever!

Yet, to be sure, you cannot get rid of worries. But you can choose not to pick up a worrisome thought when it arises in you. Only when you attend to a worry, only when you pick it up, does it control you. Non-worrying is when you choose to ignore a worry. So, worrylessness cannot be attained; but you can surely learn to be non-worrying.

To me, the little blue sticker on the Indigo cockpit door is the simplest primer available for Life. It reminds us that Life is a one-time, limited-period, offer. And encourages us not to squander our Life either by worrying or being held hostage by negative, debilitating thoughts.

Author AVIS ViswanathanPosted on December 21, 2017December 21, 2017Categories Happiness, Inner Peace, Intelligent Living, Life, Spirituality, UncategorizedTags Art of Living, AVIS Viswanathan, Cockpit, Fall Like A Rose Petal, Happiness, Indigo, Indigo Airlines, Inner Peace, Life, Meditation, Mouna, Non-worrying, Postpone Worrying, Silence, Silence Periods, Spirituality, Uncategorized, Worry, Worry-Free, WorryingLeave a comment on What the Indigo cockpit door signage teaches you about Life

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1. The author, AVIS, shares Life lessons here that he has gleaned from his lived experiences. AVIS has nothing against or for any religion. If the reader has a learning to share, they are most welcome. If the reader makes a communal or inflammatory or derogatory comment, or presents a view which may affect the sentiments of other followers/readers, then this Blog’s administrators may have to regrettably delete such a comment and even block such a follower. 2. The lived experiences shared here and the learnings gleaned from them are unique and personal to AVIS. The copyright for all original content here, that has been written/created by AVIS, belongs to AVIS Viswanathan. Important, AVIS has no interest in either infringing upon or claiming copyright of any referenced material published on this Blog. The images/videos used on this Blog, that are not created by AVIS, are purely for illustrative purposes. They belong to their original owners/creators. The author does not intend profiting from them nor is there any covert claim to copyright any of them.

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