On trusting, in the present continuous tense
Dealing with the process of grief
Every loss teaches detachment
Don’t suppress your grief and don’t hold on to it
Everything – and every person – in your Life is here on a limited-period offer
Don’t let you grief consume you
Happiness comes from transcending sadness, not by suppressing it!
Be aware. Be happy!
A young lady came to us saying she wanted to know how she can break free from feeling sad. She and her husband had been living separately for years now. Her business had folded up. The money she had borrowed from her brother for the business remained outstanding. But he had been generous enough to write off the dues. “In a way, everything that caused my sadness, my broken marriage, my failed business and my inability to pay off my loans, has been around me, with me, for a long time. Yet, I am unable to get rid of the sadness within me. What must I do,” she asked.
Good question. This lady, in my opinion, is lucky. At least she knows a. that she is sad and b. what is making her sad. Many a time, people just wallow in sadness. They don’t know it and can’t express their feeling clearly.
Even so, sadness, grief is not something unnatural. Sorrow is a very natural, real human feeling. Someone dies. You lose something. You are misunderstood. You break up in a relationship. You suffer a crippling health setback. Each of these situations can apply to any of us – at any time. And when something like that happens, chances are that you will be grief-stricken. You will wish your Life was different. This wishing will make you feel miserable and cause all your suffering. You will go down a depressive spiral and will continue to remain stuck in that cesspool of grief for a long, long time. Eventually, you will not even know what you are sad about. Sadness would have become embedded in your subconscious.
The way to haul yourself up in a situation like this is to focus on whatever gives you joy. It can be music, art, watching a movie or being alone with nature. Whatever makes you forget that you are sad, in a natural manner, do it. Drinking or smoking do not fall in this category because they are artificial and you impose them on you. Look for an immersive experience – where you can lose yourself, without count of time or without thinking about your grief!
Important, sadness and happiness are the same energy – expressed differently. Look around you. There are so many happy people. Why are you not happy in their midst? The reason is that when you look at them, you feel you can never be like them. You have conditioned yourself to thinking that way. Break free from that conditioning, from that pattern of thinking. The truth is, if you can be sad, you can be happy too! Not by replacing the factors that have caused your sadness. But by accepting the fact that you have reasons to be sad, and that, despite those reasons, you can chose to be happy doing what gives you joy!
Sorrow and suffering must not be resisted. Or controlled. Or repressed. They must be transcended. You can go past those feelings if you are aware. Awareness will always lead you to happiness!
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Go to work on your problems than just lament about them
Your ‘Mahamaham’ moment awaits you – not in Kumbakonam, but within you!
|Mahamaham – Kumbakonam
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